Addicted To Snuff

Ok, I know by just reading the title you might think that I won’t be able to say 12 days quit today, but I can. I chose that post title because that has been the equation behind each and every failed attempt to quit dipping Copenhagen in my life.

Today, I thought about going to the gas station down the street and buying a can of Copenhagen at least 5 times. Maybe it was because it was Monday, or the fact that the day started with a conference call at 8:30 am, or the fact that there is so much work to do and not enough hours in a day to do it, or maybe it was because I just wanted a dip of Copenhagen like the old days. At any rate, I knew it was going to be a rough day with my addiction.

One thing I noticed that I immediately thought about after each and every urge, craving, or temptation to buy a can of Copenhagen snuff, was how I would rationalize it. Rationalization is a key component of all continuing addictions. My rationalization just today to myself was, ‘i can’t take this stress without the snuff or nicotine, my work will suffer if I stay quit because I can’t concentrate’. How about, ‘I don’t do anything else that is bad for me, I work out, eat healthy, don’t have a history of cancer. This one thing won’t kill me, everyone needs one vice’. And probably the one that I have used the most over the last 24 years, ‘I will only have one or two dips a day from now on, what can that hurt? I know that I can control myself having been quit for this many days. If I reduce the snuff, the danger is also reduced’. Wow, how many of you have used similar rationalizations to yourself to sabotage beating your addiction?

Now, by no means am I saying that this equation alone caused all of my failed attempts to quit my snuff and nicotine addiction. What I am saying is that no matter how I solve for the equation, relapse = a + b + c …. Temptation and rationalization are always two of the variables. So what is different this time? Well, so far I believe that my commitment level is higher than it has ever been, partly because of all the research that I did prior to my quit date. As I learned in the military, and as I’m sure you have heard quoted many times, ‘know your enemy’. How can you expect to win a daily battle, let alone, the lifelong war against tobacco and nicotine addiction if you don’t even understand it? The links on the right side of the blog are some good information sources that I am using to help fight the war on Copenhagen.

I also found that by writing about my addiction and snuff usage patterns, the severity of the situation finally came to light. I always knew that I dipped many times during the day, but when you write it out hour by hour during the course of an entire day, it really becomes evident how much control the addiction has over you. This particular coping mechanism may not be for everyone, but there are other ways to log thoughts and uncover the stranglehold of the addiction, like digital voice recorders or video diaries. If you would like information on either of these, please send me an email as I have extensive knowledge on both. Don’t forget to check out my post on my daily use of Copenhagen snuff contained in the post, ‘The First Five Days – Part II‘.

Because I am only coming to the end of my 12th day in battle, I really don’t think I will go on anymore about why I am not letting the equation win this time. I know how quickly the battle can be lost, with the war soon to follow. I will, however, continue to include things that I found helpful in my daily battles in future posts. Thanks again for reading and please post your stories or updates, as it really does help others on the same road. If you want to post, please email me and I will get you access.

Matt – 12 Days Quit